I was on Shark Tank for my Alpha M. Style System. Fail. Then I went on Shark Tank again for Pete & Pedro -- but they wanted Alpha M. Another failed expectation. Recently, I have faced some more adversity which got me thinking about how I handle disappointments & adversity versus how others handle the same type of failed expectations.
Have you ever been working hard at your job and climbing the corporate ladder, positioning yourself to take the job above you when it opens? Or perhaps eyeing that sassy senorita in accounting for quite some time, wishing you had the courage to finally as her out on a date. Or perhaps studying your ass off for a test, being super prepared for it? But when the day finally comes, you’re greeted with disappointment.
You’re smacked with that feeling of displeasure caused by the unfulfilled hopes and expectations. But the biggest disappointments that I've had resulted from things I've worked really hard for. The harder you work, the more disappointing it is when something doesn't go right. If you’re not struggling and getting
disappointed from time-to-time, you’re not pushing your limits.
Life has a funny way of closing doors in order to keep you moving in the right direction, and pain is part of that growing process. Often society runs from pain and protects themselves from feeling uncomfortable. This is the reason so many people abuse drugs and alcohol – to not feel the pain. Stop running from the pain and don’t mask it. Embrace it as it’s natural and part of the growth
process. Learn from it so you can move forward stronger, faster, and smarter.
The way I see it there are two ways people handle adversity.The first way (which is pretty common and I think that a lot of people end up doing this because if they didn't, there would be a lot more successful people out there) is regressing when a disappointing blow or setback is experienced. These folks throw their hands up in the air with the excuse that they really didn’t want it that bad.
They just give up and not try anymore.
The other way is taking disappointment and using it as a tool. These people choose to use adversity as a learning experience or lesson. I know that it's tough to think about the 'silver lining' when you're going through a disappointing or a difficult time. “Where is it that damned silver lining everyone keeps talking about,” you’re thinking. Well, a lot of times you may have to look
through a bunch of clouds to find that one silver lining.
Whatever the reason for your setback or failure -- whenever you don't achieve what you’ve worked tremendously hard for, regroup and assess for reasons. And for me, I know there has to be a way to achieve that something so I keep working harder. Ultimately, it comes down to believing in yourself to find a better or alternative way to accomplish your goals. And you know what? Typically these
disappointments, for me, have ultimately resulted in something better and more positive.
When you fail at something, that just means that you have eliminated one reason or way to do things. As an inventor, Thomas Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. His comments about these unsuccessful attempts? "I didn't fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps."
I would say probably about after 550 attempts, the majority of us would have given up. Not Edison! Not me! He kept pushing forward, and so do I. So, when you get dealt a disappointing blow, don't blow it off like it's nothing ... because it isn't 'nothing'. It hurts and sucks big time, but do not dwell on it too long. You can get caught up in your head and that's not a good place to be.
Uncover the reasons that you might not have succeeded and modify them into learning experiences to propel progress and push forward so you will achieve what you set out to do. Work smarter while working harder. Bad things happen and you're not always going to get what you want, but that's okay. You move forward, work harder, and figure out a better way to do it.
Realize that it's not the end of the world, because disappointments happen -- it's a part of life. Disappointments are not meant to destroy you; they are meant to strengthen you. Never stop building toward your dreams. Should there be any disappointments along the way, use them for a sturdier foundation.
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